Secretary: Part 2

News Anchor: Breaking news--the President has made a nomination to the new post of Internet Secretary. We know little about the man, shown here. Image Caption: Possibly a haberdasher? News Anchor: Attempts to reach the nominee at home were unsuccessful. Reporter: What the hell kind of apartment has a moat? News Anchor: To understand the culture from which he came--and which he may soon administer--we sent a reporter to what we're told is the source of that culture. Tom? Tom: I'm coming to you live from the 4chan b board. Despite the tube cloggage, nascent memes are flying fast and furious. News Anchor: Why are you wearing a helmet, Tom? Tom: I'm not sure. [[Meanwhile in Ron Paul's blimp...]] Ron Paul: Ahoy! What news of the blogs? Pilot: Dr. Paul! The President's named his nominee! Ron Paul: It's not me? Ron Paul: Wait! I remember that guy from the campaign! He's a notorious troll! Ron Paul: They mustn't put him in charge. Quick, call the capitol! Pilot: Can't, sir. The tubes just went down completely. Ron Paul: Blast! Ron Paul: Then we'll go ourselves. Full speed ahead! {{The blimp advances minutely.}} {{The blimp advances minutely.}} {{The blimp advances minutely.}} Ron Paul: I said full speed! Pilot: It's a blimp, sir! {{Title text: That helmet won't save him.}}

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