xkcd Phone

[[Ad for a phone, with several factoids positioned around a picture of the device]] ((factoids listed here starting clockwise from the top)) -Runs custom blend of Android and iOS -Simulates alternative speed of light (default: 100 miles per hour) and adjusts clock as phone accelerates -Wireless -Accelerometer detects when phone is in freefall and makes it scream -When exposed to light, phone says "hi!" -FlightAware partnership: makes airplane noise when flights pass overhead -Realistic case -Clear screen -Side-facing camera Introducing the XKCD Phone -- Your mobile world just went digital® {{Title text: Presented in partnership with Qualcomm, Craigslist, Whirlpool, Hostess, LifeStyles, and the US Chamber of Commerce. Manufactured on equipment which also processes peanuts. Price includes 2-year Knicks contract. Phone may extinguish nearby birthday candles. If phone ships with Siri, return immediately; do not speak to her and ignore any instructions she gives. Do not remove lead casing. Phone may attract trap insects; this is normal. Volume adjustable (requires root). If you experience sudden tingling, nausea, or vomiting, perform a factory reset immediately. Do not submerge in water; phone will drown. Exterior may be frictionless. Prolonged use can cause mood swings, short-term memory loss, and seizures. Avert eyes while replacing battery. Under certain circumstances, wireless transmitter may control God.}}

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Comics I enjoy:
Three Word Phrase, SMBC, Dinosaur Comics, Oglaf (nsfw), A Softer World, Buttersafe, Perry Bible Fellowship, Questionable Content, Buttercup Festival, Homestuck, Junior Scientist Power Hour

Other things:
Tips on technology and government,
Climate FAQ, Katharine Hayhoe

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