((A woman is standing. A man sits at a computer.]]
Woman: Where've you been all week?
Man: Playing Half-Life 2!
Woman: ... that came out in 2004.
Man: I get games on a five-year lag. That way, I never have to buy a high-end system, but get the same steadily-advancing gaming experience as people who do -- and at a fraction of the price.
Man: There are no downsides!
Woman: I can think of
one
...
Early 2013.
Man: Guys!
Man: The cake is a lie!
[[Musical notes surround an italic line, suggesting the man is singing.]]
Man: This was a triumph.
Man: The cake is a lie!
Woman, Man #2: <<Sigh>>
{{Title text: I remember trying to log in to the original Command and Conquer servers a year or two back and feeling like I was knocking on the boarded-up gates of a ghost town. }}
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